Fight Club

/ posted in: General

The first rule of Fight Club is that you don’t talk about Fight Club.

The first rule of blogging is that you talk about everything.

I’ve been a blogger longer than a fighter so I guess that rule wins.

I went to my first fencing lesson last night. It will be henceforth known as fight club because that sounds cooler. The first thing I did was get fitted with my outfit. It starts with a molded chest protector. I have a large chest. This makes it even larger. I felt an urge to sing German opera when she strapped it on me.

This was covered with a straight-jacket-like top. Then I got my mask. Those masks are hot!

I was the only absolute beginner there at first so I got a one on one crash course in basic positioning and movement. We practiced “advance, advance, lunge” and “retreat, retreat, lunge.” The lunge is done almost like Warrior II pose in yoga but it is fast and you have to get back up fast. She warned me that fencing will develop my left side of my lower body (because I’m left handed so I’m leading with my left leg) but not the right so I should work at home on moving to the right to balance.

Then I got turned lose to play. I fenced with a 14 year old girl with a cold first. That made us sort of even since I’m out of shape and she couldn’t breathe. This is a huge cardio workout. After a few minutes I was dripping sweat. I don’t sweat like that when I run.

Then a person I recruited from work and her mom came. They admired my new and improved chest and went to get some of their own. I fought a small child and whupped him. Why yes I am proud. I did trip over my own feet and fall down in front of him at one point. Whoops.

Shelley and her mom got the basics lesson while I rotated through kids. There was one who really knew what she was doing. She slapped me hard across the left bicep with the foil. I have bruises today. I’m so proud. I sent pictures to Shelley. Her mom has a matching bruise for the same reason. That kid is in their dance school. She will be tortured at her next lesson! (Insert evil supervillian laugh)

Driving home last night my thighs and butt (both left and right sides) were hurting. I was concerned that I wasn’t going to be able to get out of the car. I told the SO to make sure I was able to get vertical before he left me this morning. I’m not as sore today but my knees are a bit stiff and I’m tired.

It was fun. I’ll definitely go back.