on April 12th 2016
Genres: Nonfiction, Personal Memoirs
Published by Cleis Press
Source: From author/publisher
Buy on Amazon (affiliate link)
“Saving Delaney is the heartwarming true story of a baby who is diagnosed with Down Syndrome and the unconventional family who fought for her right to life. Andrea Ott-Dahl, who with her partner Keston Ott-Dahl has with two other children, agreed to act as a pregnancy surrogate for a wealthy Silicon Valley family. When pre-natal testing revealed the baby would be born with Down Syndrome, Andrea was urged to abort the child. Instead, the Ott-Dahls chose to keep and raise the daughter they would call Delaney, overcoming their fears while navigating legal, medical and emotional challenges.”
I’m not going to lie. I read this book for the chocolate.
I was at BEA and the authors were signing right next to another author I was in line for. When I finished they had a short line and the BEA worker said that they were handing out chocolate with the book. That got my attention. I hadn’t been interested in the book because I don’t like babies. I’m also pro-choice and didn’t care to read a pro-life screed. Turns out I’m really more pro-chocolate than anything. I went up and got a copy of the book. Delaney even signed it for me herself.
Now I’m glad that I read this book.
The book is told from Keston’s viewpoint. When her mother died when Keston was in her early 40s, she went through a bit of a wild time. She broke up with her long term partner and decided to just have fun for a while. She wasn’t planning on meeting a woman in her late 20s with two young children and falling in love. She certainly wasn’t planning for her new girlfriend to decide that she needed to be a surrogate for another couple.
Keston had always had a phobia about people with disabilities. This view was formed when she did some community service in a residential care facility. Since that time she had actively avoided any contact.
Trying to get pregnant as a surrogate wasn’t easy for Andrea. Tensions rose between the Ott-Dahls, the prospective mothers, and the sperm donors as months passed with no pregnancy. Right when they were about to give up, Andrea got pregnant.
Routine prenatal testing showed abnormalities early. Andrea was the biological mother. An egg donor was not used. Now the question was, could she be made to abort her biological child if she signed a contract stating that the prospective mothers got to decide about any health concerns to the child? Should they keep a child with Down’s Syndrome knowing Keston’s issues with disabilities?
This book is the story of growing up and growing together. It is standing up for your family in the face of pressures from all sides. It is about learning to overcome your prejudices and convincing others to do the same.
Regardless of your personal opinions on abortion or surrogacy, I’d recommend reading this book. It gives the perspective of people wrestling with the tough choices that come with assisted reproduction that aren’t usually heard.