You know what the best things are about shopping online?

1. You can do it on the couch while watching football.

2. You don’t have to fight crowds and for a person who doesn’t like people this is a huge bonus.

3. No stupid Christmas music

4. No watching other people engage in overzealous materialism that makes me want to write off the whole human race. “If Junior doesn’t get (fill in the blank), he won’t love me anymore and his life will be RUINED!!!!”

5. It is theoretically possible to get a bit distracted. “Ok, so now what does the SO need? Look, overstock is having a sale on jewelry. I like shiny!” I’m just saying it is possible that a necklace and earrings may just be on their way to my house. Theoretically.

6. Every day is like Christmas now. The mailman brings me packages every day and I get to open them. This also helps my memory. For example I couldn’t remember if I actually bought my brother’s present or if I didn’t like the price enough that I was going to look for it elsewhere. Turns out I must have bought it because it was delivered.