Why Do Old Ladies Want to Fight Me?/ posted in: General, Work
A lot of strange things happen around me. The person who I tell all these things to has suggested that I start a blog. Little does she know that I did just that… in 2004. So, in honor of her I’ve decided to write up some of the oddness of my days. I’m not sure if the people around me are just odd or if I’m somehow causing the absurdity or if I am just good at recognizing how weird everyone else is.
Yesterday I did a recheck of a dog that wasn’t healing up as quickly as I would have liked. The dog was on antibiotics and should have had one day of medication left. Since he was better but not all the way cured, I told the owner that I would get her a few more days of antibiotics and that should take care of the infection.
The owner pulled herself up to her full height and got suddenly feisty. “I have LOTS of antibiotics left! I don’t need more!”
This is not my first rodeo. I glanced quickly at the computer to make sure the fault here was not mine. Very clearly the label on the Rx said to give the pills every 12 hours. “You’ve been giving the pills once a day?”
“Yes!” How dare I question her treatment of the dog? I explained that the label said twice a day. She did not want to back down. I swear that woman was considering throwing hands. We convinced her eventually. Then we had to console her when she decided that she was the worst dog owner in the history of dog owners and that she had broken her dog. Nah, just finish what you have at twice a day and we’ll call it good.
There is a restaurant near my office that keeps luring me in by having a lot of vegetarian options even though they never really taste all that good. Also, the first time I went there, this happened.
“Hillary Clinton owns the Big Pharma companies.” I hate it when people get their conspiracies confused.
— Heather (@Dvmheather) September 13, 2017
“Those are the people who are into climate control.” I don’t think they know the difference between air conditioning & global warming.
— Heather (@Dvmheather) September 13, 2017
Yeah, I’ve gone back. Bad food and weird customers. I don’t understand it myself. Anyway, today I was seated for the first time in the same area where the chemtrail discussion took place. I was a bit nervous. There were two elderly ladies getting ready to leave the booth behind where I was sitting down. They were in a discussion about where one’s scarf had gotten to. It was not entirely clear to either woman if the owner of the scarf had actually been wearing it at any point today once they thought about it.
I sat down and suddenly one of them latched onto my right tricep. She had a good, strong grip. I thought maybe she was going to ask me to look under my table for the scarf. I looked up at her. She looked at me expectantly. I said, “Yes?”
“Aren’t you Andrea?” she asked while giving my arm a vigorous shake.
“Really?” Still shaking me. She was unconvinced clearly. Maybe this Andrea is a known liar.
“You could be her.” She gestured emphatically to my face with her free hand. “Your whole face. You could be her.” Shake, shake. She still seemed to think that I could be Andrea trying to deny knowing her. She peered closer. “You could be.” Then she let go and wandered off.
A little while later, a lady walked into the restaurant, grabbed 2 menus and some silverware from the hostess stand, and went to go seat herself. A waitress stopped her and asked if she could help her. She said yes and gave the waitress her drink order and then seated herself. The waitress took her drink to her. No one ever came to join her. In a little bit she came up to the waitress station and asked why her food was taking so long. The waitress told her that she had said she wasn’t going to order food yet. They decided together that that was a very good reason for the food to not have showed up.
There was literally a disturbance in the space time continuum while I was there. After I ate my whole lunch, it was 1:24. I settled in with my book, pleased that I had extra time to read. It didn’t occur to me that it didn’t make any sense for it to be 1:24. I left work at 1 and it had been a lot longer than 24 minutes ago. I realized when I saw the time on my phone flip from 1:24 to 1:41. I’m not sure what kind of Matrix-level fun house I was in but I got out.