Getting old is rough. I’m a super healthy person. But I think I’m getting my karmic come uppance for complaining one too many times about paying for my health insurance every month when I have never, ever, in my entire life had enough medical bills in a year to go over my deductable.

On Friday I had a sore throat. I coughed a bit all weekend. Monday afternoon I started to get a raspy voice. Tuesday morning I woke up with no voice whatsoever. I can whisper. So when we went shopping yesterday people had to translate for me. I asked the husband to talk for me when we went to buy the computer. But he declined and got my brother to do it instead. You see, the husband and I have a mixed marriage. He’s a PC guy and I’m a dedicated Mac girl. He vowed to love and honor but nowhere in the vows did he ever say he’d aid and abet in my buying of a new Mac. His excuse was that my brother (also a Mac guy) would know what questions to ask.


When we were leaving the store my brother lovingly noted, as only a brother can, that I was a sorry sight. I was using one crutch, was unable to speak, and had to large bruise on my left arm because Spirit bit me. We batted around the idea of sending the husband to jail on abuse charges. “Officer, he broke my bones and then now that they are healing he hit my arm and made me scream so loud I lost my voice.” He’s lucky I like him or he could be in real trouble.

I still can’t talk so I had the husband call off work for me. He handed the phone to me so my boss could hear how funny I sounded. The two of them were laughing so hard they could hardly talk. I’m glad I’m amusing.

I went to the doctor and found out I have bronchitis and something eating up the back of my throat. My strep test was negative. So known I’m on antibiotics that are making me sicker than I ever felt with the bronchitis and on cough medicine too. I’m also off work tomorrow too. Great – a whole week without pay.

I’m not a person that strangers generally want to talk to. I’ve never once had a conversation on a plane, for example. But, today, when I can’t talk people were lining up to talk to me. I gave directions to a guy in a parking lot. I talked to two ladies in line at the movies. One had a cane and one was an interpreter for the deaf. They found me fascinating. We discussed injuries. The cane lady has horses too. They were slightly disappointed that I was sick and not a deaf lip reader with limited language skills. I grew up with deaf friends. They talk much better than I sound today.

There had been a power outage at the theater. When I got there they were letting people back in who had had their movies interrupted. One guy was super obnoxious. He had some little kids with him. The woman taking tickets said that she wasn’t exactly sure when the movie would restart because they were juggling schedules but it would be soon. He tore into her about the inconvience like she had personally cut the power. He quit quickly though because even idiots sometimes see that it doesn’t look good to beat up a woman with cerebral palsy in a wheelchair in front of a whole bunch of people. Then he was behind me in the refreshment line. They were rebooting the registers. He was mad because there was only one working register. He was talking to his kids and saying things like, “They’ve got only one speed here and it is slow. Doesn’t it make you want to punch them in the nose?” Then he had the kids cheerfully chant, “Punch them in the nose! Punch them in the nose!” over and over. Nice patience and coping skills he’s teaching there.